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 For the Ladies to think about. 
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The discussion we had in class last week has been haunting me. Last week it was brought up that certain cultures/ethnic groups/races making comments to women is popular. I feel that this is a very dangerous thing to state because we automatically stereotype each male of that certain race as being too friendly with women. Way back when I took some psychology classes we discussed a theory called a self-fufilling prophecy. The theory says that often we set ourselves up to see a certain situation the way we have stereotyped it. For instance a waiter may see a table of college students and assume that they will not tip well because they are in college therefore he may not go out of his way to give the best service to this table. When the students don't recieve equal service they will not tip well, in the waiters mind this justifies his stereotype that college students do not tip well, when in reality college students don't tip well when they recieve poor service. So I was thinking about this theory in class and wondering if we, women, set ourselves up too. I mean possibly we are more likely to notice Mexcian and African American males making comments because when we see them we are automatically on our guard because we expect comments. However when we pass white males we may not notice the comments because we are not on our guard. Just something to think about!


Wed Nov 09, 2005 3:13 pm
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You bring up a very good point!!!


Thu Nov 10, 2005 2:16 pm
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Good point.... but honestly a LOT of the sterotyping (for me at least) has come from a firm background. I mean, not everyone is the same or should pay for their ancestor's mistakes, but there have been instances where men have overstepped their boundaries... It may not be as prevalent here in America, but it happens. Think about it, many middle eastern women are not allowed even to show their face hardly... so ultimately there is a whole race of men out there that think they can treat women any way they want. And this isnt just in that one spot. I traveled to Fiji 2 summers ago... and ran into some situations where I could have gotten in a lot of trouble. First of all... we wore skirts everywhere.... no clothing that showed anything above the knee or up past the shoulder was acceptable (tank tops and such). Hmmm... that sucks. haha. But above that I was approached by a male who decided he could get anything he wanted out of me. And when I said no, he didn't understand.
And I quote, "You mean in America, women can do what they want?"
Me... "Uh, YEAH!"
Him..."Well, you're not in America anymore"
Me.. "Yeah, but I'm still me."
Him.. "ooooohhhh!"

Its like he just didnt get it. There was a cultural barrier there where he thought he could treat me the way he has always treated women. It didnt occur to me either that he didn't understand that I was an independent woman, able to stand up for myself. And I mean, this wasn't in the city where men could have been joking, trying to get a rise of the white woman tourist. This was deep in the back country in a small village. This guy was serious... and he did have culture in his life and knew what he was saying. He wasn't the sheltered type who only lives by what he sees his father do. So, yeah, rough stuff! I learned later that in Fiji, a woman's worth is equal to how many children they can bare a male. Women there are expected one child a year. Talk about a hard life. Im sorry, but 1) I know my body couldnt put out one child per year, and 2) NO man will tell me how many children I am going to have. I mean, I hope to have some one day with a man I love, but I will NEVER be demanded to have children. I think I am the boss of that. hahaha.

So to make a long story short.... I have just had experiences in other countries where men honestly don't know better and will treat women the way THEY think is right, which by our standards, arent even close.


ps. if you want more info bout my experiences in Fiji... just ask!


Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:37 am
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Oh and... this is just a lil bit about me:

I mean, I think we all do it. We see someone we think is hot and we wisper to our friend about it.... and how do you think it makes that other person feel, so see someone look at you and then go and wisper to their friend. Uhh, not good. Even a step above that... I've been in a club or bar or whatever and have had WHITE men grab the bootay thinkin its ok. Given, I've gotten in thier face bout it makin sure they WONT do it again, but it was a WHITE guy. I don't accept the fact that we say its always the hispanics or african americans who have crossed the line. The only time african american men or hispanics have crossed the line is if I have insinuated in the first place. I mean, ill be the first to say that I am a bit friendly... and have had a lot of experience with people of different races making comments towards me. But its only if I have given them a look and a smile first. I guess that was the "ok" for them to say whatever.... even though for me it was just a smile and nod. I think society has just become OVER sensitive about certian things. I mean, due to all the kidnappings, rapes and murders over the years, women given ONE GLANCE freak out and call the cops. I just dont see men overstepping their boundary much... maybe its just me being open minded.

and to be honest... I like people from other races. If would probably pay more attention to an african american male in my class than a white guy. I just think different people are interesting. "EQUAL OPPORTUNITY" thats what I call it. hahahha. I dunno, im just rambling. whatev. why dont you REPLY to this :P It'd make me feel better, ha!


Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:52 am
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I def. agree with all of these girls. This is a great point that Sarah M. made. I think we do all form stereotypes not meaning to at some points. As women, we always need to be on gaurd and not just because we may be passing a male of minority that there may be stereotypes about. Also, when your in another country, its important to be aware of their customs and the way they live their lives. Great discussion by these girls!! :D

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Mon Nov 14, 2005 5:38 pm
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I think this was a very interesting point. I have diffenately have witnessed all races "Hootin" at females. And your right they weren't all African American.


Wed Nov 30, 2005 1:41 pm
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