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 Bullying among the genders. 

Bully or Bullied?
Bully 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Bullied 29%  29%  [ 4 ]
Both 29%  29%  [ 4 ]
Neither 43%  43%  [ 6 ]
Total votes : 14

 Bullying among the genders. 
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Hey, I went to a seminar on bullying the other night and it got me thinking. I know how you can tell when boys are bullying/being bullied because I've dealt and received my fair share. What I'm wondering is how do you tell if a young lady is being bullied? I never noticed it in high school, but I wasn't really looking either. Is it as aggressive and blatant as male bullying? Give me the facts.

Also ladies, if you have the same question only flipped feel free to ask.

And if you have any suggestions for dealing with it lay them out here.

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-Rodney Woods

"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And when you look long into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you" - Nietzsche


Thu Feb 02, 2006 12:46 am
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Well Rodney, I think that girls and boys definately have different kinds of bullying. Girls are sneakier and more subtle and get more so with age. When we're little, we say "I'm not going to play house with her...she's not our friend anymore." But when we're older, girls talk about each other behind their backs or laugh at a private joke when a certain girl walks by. I think most of time, the girl being made fun of is aware of this treatment and is intimidated, especially if the girls are considered to be the "popular" girls. What ways do guys bully?

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Laurie Tate


Thu Feb 02, 2006 11:12 am
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Boys are more aggressive. They may not physically harm another boy, but there is intimidation and name calling. Back in the olden days (9th & 10th grade) I had perfected "shouldering" where you would walk down a hallway and bump into certain people with your shoulder causing them to drop their books and stuff. It isn't an overly aggressive looking move but teachers should be able to recognize it because it isn't an accident that you bumped into that person. Its definitely an intimidation move and the person doing it knows it and the person who did it knows it.

Man, I'm glad I grew out of that.

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-Rodney Woods

"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And when you look long into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you" - Nietzsche


Thu Feb 02, 2006 11:25 am
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I'm taking Psych of Gender, and we actually talked about this on the first day of class. It's not that boys are necessarily more aggressive than girls, but they are more physically aggressive; girls are more relationally aggressive, as in the ways Laurie described. This is a big generalization, but girls are more likely to make you feel like crap, and boys are more likely to beat the crap out of you.

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Maggie Chambers

Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten. ~ B. F. Skinner


Thu Feb 02, 2006 5:11 pm
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In addition to what Maggie said, we did a study of the difference between male and female aggression and found that often times males dropped their hate or aggression after they fought, but girls held on to it and were not as quick to forgive. I'm not 100% sure how accurate that is, as I've really not had that much experience with it, but from what I know about my guy and girl friends, it would seem to hold some truth.

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Danny Jugan

"I don't know how to tell you this, but I'm kinda a big deal...People know me."


Fri Feb 03, 2006 8:51 am
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i don't know i think girls can be aggressive, i think it depends on the person. i think when i was an adolescent i put on a front and i did intimidate people also through my early high school years. this only developed into a headstrong personality which i'm glad that i have. i think that i am more approachable now at least i hope so but people i went to school with that did not even know me have told me they were scared of me. i really don't know why, i was kind of a jerk but i wasn't a fighter. i'm sure i did this to protect myself from being hurt emotionally by people.

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Teresa Holden


Mon Feb 06, 2006 3:48 pm
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Speaking from the percspective of my friends, girls bully just as much as guys, if not more so.

Back in high school, I was the "floater", I know you all knew one, the guy with friends in all clicks but never a part of any of them. Well I experienced my share of being bullied from about 7th grade until freshman year, but it was guy bullying. As long as I stood my ground I'd be fine, and I was. The thing I've noticed about guys and bullying is that it lasts for a time and then the guys will fight it out verbally or physically and things will be kosher.

But my female friends, In high school there were a lot of them, would always tell me that they had had problems with that girl, or that girl from 1st grade. It seems, for girls, that someone does something to another girl to anger them and the girl who was angered will team up with a bunch of her friends never allow that other girl a chance to redeem herself. And then the bullying starts. The other girl will be neglected friendship, rumors will be spread, and anytime that girl gets a friend the opposition will try to drive a wedge between them. This is what I noticed and I hope I'm not completely off-base with this.

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Tue Feb 07, 2006 8:49 pm
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I would like to expand on my earlier comment. I think women in general tend to have more complex relationships because we tend to communicate more with each other. From my personal experience, Adam is right in that girls seem to always have a problem with at least one other girl. In my own group of girlfriends, we were fiercely loyal to each other so if someone messed with one of us, it was understood that you messed with all of us. If we were so inclined, we could have collectively made a girl's life miserable just from our sheer numbers. And then you have the cases where girls seem to hate each other for no reason at all. These girls would be extremely aggressive towards each other, but primaraly emotional and social aggression. But in my high school, we did have cases of women physically fighting, although not as frequently as men. In talking to one of my teachers, he told me that girls were more vicious in fighting, with more hair pulling, biting, that sort of thing. We even had an infamous fight where two preganant girls got in a fight. So although I think girls are more socially agressive, they are highly capable of being physically aggressive as well.

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Laurie Tate


Wed Feb 08, 2006 12:58 am
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Girls can be evil! Guys just sorta shove each other around....inflict a little physical pain! But, girls are vicious! That sticks and stones crap is so untrue....words are worse than getting hit! I absolutly loved highschool...but middle school was hell! An older girl...lets call her Alison...just took a disliking to me immediatly! Said...that I was a cutter...had gashes all over my body....I did drugs.....I was a slut (made up some nasty rumors about teachers and older men)...the only reason I looked the way I did was because of plastic surgeory (before it looked like something had run over my face)! I went to a private school...so kids can get away with a lot more than in public schools (the whole Christian turn the other cheek thing). So I dealt with this for a year. It could have been much worse though! Most, almost all my friends, in school were guys and I was completly surrounded all the time by them because, I gusse they were afraid she would do something to me! I had a few, close girl friends...but the rest of the girls spread whatever Alison said! But, it finally came to an end when she announced that she was going to fix my face for me.....one of my guy friends said she brought a razor blade to school...but I think she meant she was just going to beat the crap outa me. If you've ever scene a bunch of guys pummel a girl its kinda scary...they attacked this girl. She was kicked out of school that day! She was also later kicked out of public school for drugs and hurting people....she is currently working at Burger King!

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Anna Kate Shook
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Wed Feb 08, 2006 9:11 am
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lets talk about boys bullying girls and vice a versa. i was bullied in middle school, not by girls but by boys.

use your imagination:

i am 20 right now, but my body has been basically the same since the 8th grade...and since i looked that way, so young it was really easy to get boys attention...well when the boys realized that i didnt want their attention they decided it was a GREAT idea to make things up about me and things that i might have done in my personal life with boys and blah blah blah you know what i mean...

so it happens, as young as middle school that boys and girls give it to eachother just as much (i think) as within same sex situations. and you might be wondering, "well, how can we as teachers catch on to these rumors that boys make about girls and girls make about eachother etc.?"

aparently it's easy, because in the 8th grade i was confronted by 3 of my teachers about stuff boys were saying about me. i think teachers know more about students than we think they do.

all we can do is be aware, and keep our ears and eyes open.

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rebecca brown

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Mon Feb 13, 2006 2:37 pm
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Maggie made some great points and I totally agree.

I think that Danny made a great point too when he said that girls are less likely to forgive. That is so true! Girls hold grudges in most cases way longer than guys. I remember my brother and his friend would get so angry at each other, get into a fist fight, have black eyes, and then the next day, they were best friends again. Girls take time. If something blows up between girls, they are much more likely to hold on to the anger and the hurt. I'm generally not a very agressive person. I tend to bottle it up if something bothers me, and later that just causes more problems. Even in college, I have to work on expressing my feelings so they don't drive me crazy later.

Bullying between boys and girls is a huge issue, and it mostly goes back to sexual harassment. As teachers, that is something we are going to have to nip in the bud because what might look like innocent flirting or whatever can have some nasty effects.

Good topic Rodney!

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Kelly Allen


Mon Feb 13, 2006 3:02 pm
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